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Saturday, October 29, 2011

Quotes of the Day

There is a tradition among many different theatre companies that I've been involved with called "Quote of the Day". Theatre folk seem to have their own language sometimes when trying to convey abstract and intangible ideas. We also have a tendency to speak 'off the cuff' at times, creating quotes and one-liners that (when taken out of context) sound hilarious, odd or offensive to the uninitiated.

Thus, the following quotes may not be for those that are easily offended or don't care about/understand the creative process of putting on a show. But I figured this was as good a place as any to share them with those theatre friends that would get a kick out of 'em. And hell, maybe after reading a few of 'em, it'll pique your interest enough to come see the show!!

Without further ado, some QOD's from the production of 'Next Fall' at Actors Theatre:

“That movie is why I started pole-vaulting in High School!” CD

“If it's an ass that big, it has to be professionally mounted.” AW

“And a clamshell for Debra K.” AM

“There's no 'but' for that gay.” AM

“But every other time he's on his knees, it's tolerable.” RH

“Take it from Jeffrey Dahmer.” MW

“God is gay.” MW

“Take it from behind... then I don't have to feel you up onstage.” MW

"I was trying to be tight and stuff." RH

"She's gnawing on a bull penis... my housekeeper, not my dog..." DS

"It's Luke. It's Ben's brother... Cool!" MW

"I saw people playing with themselves again." MW

"Nice vegetable kid." MW

"The Hardy Boys were gay?" DD

"He's a non-denominational American." MW


Friday, October 28, 2011

Things I learned on the light rail tonight....

Chivalry is alive and well! I got on the light rail and a former California EMT snatched my bike from my hands before I could even protest and hefted it (with a bit of difficulty, to my delight) right on up to the hook. I could have kissed him! But I didn't. But I'm pretty sure I awarded him 'Hero of the Day'. I didn't have a trophy on me, but he seemed happy with the verbal accolade. (And I say I delight in his difficulty because I thought my issues were due to being a weakling. Turns out, the bike is just one bulky, heavy bitch.)

Five strangers on a train (from vastly different backgrounds and upbringing) can come up with a half-dozen viable ideas for a hit reality TV or web series.


If a man can buy you tampons without being squeamish – and chooses the right brand, absorbency, fragrance and applicator; he is a KEEPER.


I make character assumptions based on the food/cooking shows people watch. It's awful. I sit in rapt conversation with those who claim 'No Reservations' or mention Paula Deen, Chopped or Iron Chef. 'Bitchin' Kitchen' or 'Almost Homemade'? Ummm... Dismissed. I know, it's terrible of me. But I guess that's an inner litmus test that I never knew I had. ...And knowing is half the battle.


After writing a blog (that I still haven't finished or posted yet) that compared the differences between the Phoenix light rail and the New York subway, I thought I preferred the silence and the lack of conversation of NY. But I have to admit that human interaction and a few laughs sure do make the ride seem a lot shorter and much more pleasant.


I've more to share on my many light rail adventures, but it has been a long day. I'm anxious to have an audience for the show... and genuinely nervous for the first time in a long time. I still feel a bit green when it comes to this contemporary drama stuff... but at the end of the day, I feel like I've worked... and have been a part of creating something really special.

As my friend, Ms. Rosenberg, would say, “Ain't nuthin' wrong with that.”

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Adventures Condensed

So I haven't blogged in ages (clearly) but have had one hell of a month!

At the end of last month, I spent a couple days in Arkansas on my way to New York. What a crazy, wonderful getaway it was!!
I got the chance to visit with some of my new friends from Arkansas Repertory Theatre (where we did Hairspray) which was AH-MAZING! The entire theatre was renovated over the summer and looks Gorjey McGorgeous!
I realized on this trip to Little Rock that I don't hate Phoenix as much as I thought I did. In fact, some of the things I love about that city are the similarities to Phoenix. I like the lushness of the south, though... and everyone seems nicer just because of their accents. They've perfected the art of the 'kind insult' - softening any blow by following it with, "Bless their heart..."
And truthfully, I'm a sucker for any town that has BBQ, Fried Fish and sweet tea on every corner. So...
SOLD!
From there, I was off to New York for a week of auditions. It was supposed to also include lots of visiting with friends, sightseeing and a show every night, but that was certainly not the case. I ended up being so swamped with auditions and visiting old friends that I really didn't do the touristy sight-seeing at all. For one thing, I didn't bring any of my three cameras (so much for traveling light) and even though I had my phone-cam, it's crappy, blurry, never focuses right, etc.
In a nutshell, auditions went well. Very well. Well enough that I'm trying to make it back to NY in January for another set of callbacks. (Which would be for projects mostly over the summer and the beginning of next season.)
But, rather than blog... which I suspect would be boring... I figured I'd offer up a video montage instead.


Monday, October 10, 2011

A letter to my teenage daughter

First Published: October, 2011

Hey Daughter,

I wanted to share some things with you that I didn't get to last night. It was late when we got off the phone. You were still upset. But I've been thinking about you nonstop since we hung up, and decided there were things too important not to say. And because I want us both to remember them, I'm writing them down.

*It is more important to be smart than pretty. Pretty ages. It fades. It gets corrupted by flattery and skewed by vanity. Beauty, however, goes hand in hand with wisdom. And that comes from within. And don't ever confuse beauty with perfection. Beauty is symmetry and balance, but we know what balance is. It is light and dark, strength and weakness, humility and daring. You have all of these qualities, C. You are beautiful. Great power requires great responsibility. And beauty requires wisdom. The best decisions are not always made quickly and require a balance of head and heart, theorems and art, science and miracles.

*You are complete and whole as a person. Don't ever be fooled into thinking that you need someone in your life to 'complete you'. There will be people in your life who complement and encourage you, but your value will never be dependent on your ability to maintain a romantic relationship. Stay close to the people who inspire you. You are magical and amazing and don't need to waste your time with the negative people in this world. You will love people in your lifetime who are toxic. It will hurt. But you will learn how special some people are, and it will increase your capacity to love those people all the more.

*Gone are the days of making decisions for you. You will never again have to suffer the humiliation of ruffled panties or facial indentations from frilly headbands I've chosen for you to wear. You will no longer be forced to sit through a church service or theatrical event that bores you to tears. As an adult, you will have the choice to participate or walk away. That decision is yours. Don't make it to impress me, or please your dad, or in the hopes of pleasing or impressing someone else in your life. Make it for you. This is your life. In the end, you have to be the one to live with your choices. Choose happiness. Choose joy. Choose freedom. Choose your bliss.

*There is ugliness in this world. You've been exposed to a portion of it in your life. I am guilty of failing to protect you when you were younger. That you've seen and heard violence and anger and disrespect between people who are supposed to love and protect you (and each other) is one of my biggest regrets as a parent. I hope that your life is such that you never encounter extreme ugliness or violence personally; but statistically speaking, it will directly affect you. Please know that I will always be here for you. I may not always know the right answer immediately, but I can always hold you until we figure out what to do together. Violence is a choice. Peace is a choice. Choose Peace. Choose Love.

*Choose your relationships wisely. They will set (or lower) the standards for future relationships and affect you in ways you are currently unaware of. Hormones are a sonofabitch and believe me, I understand the 'warm and tinglies'... or you wouldn't be here. But sex never makes a relationship easier. It only adds a layer of potential complications and issues. It requires impeccable communication and compatibility over the long-term. When it's right, though, it's amazing. Protect your body and your heart, but own your sexual identity. (Just don't be a slut about it.)

I'll end this for now. I'm sure there will be more at a later time. But these are just some of the things that have come up in the last few days with our talks. I figured now was as good a time as any to let you know. I love you.

~Mom

Friday, October 7, 2011

Next Fall

I'm totally cheating by posting a blog that I wrote for Actor's Theatre, but I haven't had much time to commit bloggery in the past week.
I will, however, set aside some time in the next few days to regale all you (four) readers with my adventures back in Little Rock and NYC. For now, here's a peek at what I'm up to.

“What are you doing right now?”

“I'm in rehearsals for Next Fall.”

“For what show and why are you rehearsing a year in advance?”

“No, the name of the show is Next Fall.”

“Oh. Hmph. Never heard of it.”


What I thought would be yet another amazing show that no one has heard of has already proven to be much more than I could possibly blog about in one sitting.

A lesson in serendipity.

I just returned from New York. This was my first trip to the city and was somewhat spontaneous in nature, so I didn't have much of an agenda. I had picked up my script two days before leaving so that I would have something to occupy myself on the plane and perhaps in the audition 'holding rooms'.

And here's where the serendipity begins...

Holly (the character I'm playing) is a citified hippie. She's part New York business woman, part crystal-clutching, shakra-healing, master of the downward dog. Her faith is in energies and higher powers rather than specific deities and she finds comfort and fellowship among her self-help groups and charity fundraisers. I'm not afraid to admit that Holly and I share more than a few common characteristics, not all of them healthy or 'normal' by the majority standards, but we serve a necessary, if eclectic, function in the world.

When in NYC, I stayed with a friend at 73rd and Columbus and read (with some amusement) Holly's story about walking down 74th and Columbus. Some coincidence.

I read further to Butch's reference of his driver from JFK; “Saheed was a yakker with a lead foot,” and guffawed out loud. My driver from Newark Airport was a chatty Pakistani (in the city 22 years) named Sayyed.

I could go on to include the many Jewish references in the show (most of which I had only just learned about from my friend Sandy – who bears the same last name as another character I reference)... or the shared favorite candle scents... or the pot-smoking friend named Rachel... but needless to say, I was emotionally bonded to the script (and Holly) after the first read.

But that isn't where the serendipity ends.

There is a kind of 'theatre magic' that happens on some projects that is unexplainable.

I had the opportunity to work with Matthew on Noises Off for Phoenix Theatre most recently, and further back had worked with David Vining as a dialect coach and Debra K. on a one-night reading of Lysistrata. I'd also worked at length with April Miller and David Dickinson at Southwest Shakes and Shakespeare Sedona. But the culmination of all this is Robert Harper, playing Adam, Holly's life-saver and BFF. 'Robbie' and I have worked numerous projects together. From community theatre, to corporate events, to private gigs to professional and regional theatres, he has alternately been my director, my choreographer, my teacher and my castmate. More than this, the man is my mentor and my friend.

And so it was, on the night of our first read-thru, that we sat across the table from each other as we read the final pages of our script.

“He looked at me.”

My eyes met Robbie's... and with one look, he cracked open my heart and gutted my soul.


I understood at once what this play is about. It's about faith. It's about relationships. It's about protecting the ones we love. It's about loyalty and acceptance.

It's about serendipity and believing in something bigger than yourself. ...and I do.